First of all, thank you to all of the people who inquired about my progress throughout the month. It was appreciated. Second, I didn't take into account the fact that muscles grow faster than ligaments. There were times when my elbows hurt, so if you are thinking of attempting a similar feat, please keep that in mind. And third, I tried a tiered system I found off of the Internet and, like all things off of the Internet, things aren't what they seem.
The final total: 39.
Considering I started at 10, I think a nearly 300% increase is acceptable.
That means that some lucky (TBD) charity will receive a $61 check. Suggestions welcomed.
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Monday, January 30, 2012
In due time.
If there’s one rule I’ve learned about creativity it’s this:
everything in its own time.
That’s not to say that you can’t rush a thing out the door
when a deadline is looming. Or that having more time will translate into a
better final result.
It means that when an idea or a product or a thing is done,
it’s done.
I have a friend who only writes one draft of a story. He’ll
spend as long as he needs to in one sitting to get it done, but he never goes
back to rewrite it. I can respect that. There’s something in going with your
first instinct.
I have clients who want things from me “yesterday”, but they
don’t realize the chain of events involved in bringing things to life. They
only see the final product. And we make it look easy.
I have other friends who can’t wait for the next installment
of Mr. Dog-Turd Hand. But every panel, every stink line takes time to draw. And
sometimes the page just isn’t talking to me. So I wait—I take the time—until
I’m ready to draw the next chapter.
![]() |
The mythical Cyclopsicorn |
Recognizing the process takes perspective and, thankfully,
perspective can be had in several ways. The first is through separation. Giving
yourself time away, like taking the advice to “look at it with fresh eyes in
the morning”, is sometimes all a person needs to know whether a thing is
completed. Another way is through experience. Doing a thing over and over again
helps a person learn the nuances that can lead to shortcuts. And a third way is
to just stop and listen. There’s a reason people say they “go with their gut”
because it’s sometimes the best indicator of what a person knows before they
actually understand it themselves.
Like this picture of this Cyclopsicorn. I set out to draw a
unicorn, but a one-eyed unicorn just spoke to me. What can I say? The timing was right.
Labels:
advertising,
creativity,
cyclopsicorn,
in due time,
perspective,
timing
Friday, January 27, 2012
Best Picture 2
Casablanca is regarded as one of the best movies of all time. It's a fantastic movie and I highly recommend it, but I can't help feeling that some of its enduring quality is because it wasn't made in the Era of Sequels*. Think about it: would you still consider it as great if they had released Casablanca 2: Sam Plays It Again**? What about Sophie's Other Choice: Eeny, Meeny, Miney & Mo***? Citizen Kane: Rosebud's Revenge****? Tree of Life 2: The Branchening*****?
*TM
**TM
***TM
****(R)
*****Patent Pending
*TM
**TM
***TM
****(R)
*****Patent Pending
Thursday, January 26, 2012
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Hugging the Client
On out of town business trips I’ve observed an interesting
phenomenon that seems to occur with surprising regularity. It’s a phenomenon
which I’ll call “hugging the client”. I call it that because that’s exactly
what happens.
While my history as a “hugger” is spotty at best and
ridiculed at worst*, I am not opposed to a good hug. I’m just surprised that,
after a mere 24 hours, people known to me in only a professional capacity decide
that they want to hug me. If it only happened once, I could chalk it up to that
one person. But it seems to be happening with every client I meet. I guess it’s
a testament to my charm and/or strong and inviting arms**?
*You know who you are
**I have been doing a
lot of push-ups lately
Labels:
advice,
hugging the client,
push ups,
traveling
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Glass with Class
![]() |
Opening bid starts at $300,000.99. |
![]() |
Rare dinosaur eggs. 3 for $3 million. |
![]() |
Crystal ball or crystal haul? $2,000. |
Labels:
Glass class,
third degree glass
Monday, January 23, 2012
These words entitle you to nothing.
On the latest episode of Parks
& Recreation, guest star Paul Rudd plays a character used to getting
everything he wants. He believes because he wants something that he is entitled
to have it.
This sense of entitlement is something I’ve seen a lot
lately. People seem to think I owe them something. Outside of basic common
courtesies, like not giving them wet willies or wedgies in public, I don’t.
Right now, you are reading my blog. In fact, you are reading
it for free. This is an important point—no money has changed hands. We have not
engaged in a transaction.
While it is true that I have made a commitment to post a new
article each day, I DO NOT OWE YOU AN ARTICLE A DAY. You are entitled to
nothing.
That might sound harsh, but the beauty is that it goes both
ways. YOU DO NOT OWE ME A THING.
So where does that leave us? Right back where we started at
the beginning of this article. I write what I hope will be interesting to you
and you decide if you want to come back or not. If I fail to post articles or
post things you don’t like, you can stop reading. That, at least, is something to
which you are entitled.
Labels:
Entitlement,
nothing,
parks and recreation tv,
paul rudd
Friday, January 20, 2012
Thursday, January 19, 2012
Stop. Drop. And Post.
I’m continually impressed, when a natural disaster or crisis
strikes, at the presence of mind people have to share things with their social
networks as they are happening. Some of my favorites.
·
OMG! This hail is really coming down HARD!
·
OMG! A tornado just passed over my house. Sirens
going off!
·
OMG! I think I’m about to be punched in the
fsaslk;g
·
OMG! Locusts!
·
OMG! Aliens!
·
OMG! Zombies!
·
OMG! The snow is just piling up. There’s got to
be at least 10 feet out there.
·
OMG! Taxes due tomorrow. IRS for realz???
·
OMG! The condom just broke.
·
OMG! My phone is being stol
Labels:
humor,
OMG,
social networks,
stop drop and post
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
Catch the Phrase
Among trends I find annoying is when a
celebrity, famous personality or public figure is patently trying to coin a
catchphrase.
·
That’s what HE said.
·
Oh clap!
·
#Losing!
·
“dis-like”
·
“no likey”
·
“Likez”
·
Epic Snail
·
Oh no, you failed to do so.
·
Kryp-to-nite!
·
Dust off the White House shelves in 2012
·
Bro-Brother
·
Bunemployment
·
You can’t sneeze THAT into a tissue
·
Niiiiiice pantaloons.
·
That Tad Guy? More like: That RAD Guy!
Labels:
catchphrases,
that rad guy
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Learnin' 'n' such
I recently canceled my Netflix membership, not because of
anything they did, but because I realized that I wanted to do more with my time
this year.
If you know me or have read this blog for any period of
time, you’ll know that I like to learn stuff about things. That may seem flip,
but it’s true: I enjoy the process of learning, oftentimes regardless of
subject matter.
Take this past weekend for instance. I took a glass blowing
sampler class (http://www.thirddegreeglassfactory.com)
with a friend of mine. I learned that I’m really good at using the torches,
okay at making paper weights* and horrible at cutting glass. And I also learned
that my friends think it’s funny that I took a “glass blowing” class**.
After the class, I drove up to Chicago for a friend’s
birthday. I saw this as the perfect opportunity to learn some Japanese for an
upcoming trip. Using the Pimsleur system, I was soon saying “domo
arigato” with the best of them***. But I also learned that you can only learn
so much of a language at a time before your**** brain turns to mush.
My friends and I also learned that you can, in fact, sleep 8
adult humans in a single one-bedroom apartment*****. It's a lesson everyone should learn once in their life.
*Happy birthday/Merry Christmas/Joyous other event
**I suspect they just wanted to get me to use “blow” in a
sentence
***Other people learning Japanese, duh
****my
*****Chicago hosts: you rock
Friday, January 13, 2012
Musings & Melodies
I write for a living*. And over the years I’ve realized that
I can only listen to certain types of music while I’m writing.
·
Instrumental
music—Classical, Jazz, Electronic, Dub Step, a 15-minute shredding guitar
solo, whatever. As long as there aren’t any lyrics or vocals to distract me,
I’m able to concentrate just fine. Old favorite: Beastie Boys—The In Sound From
Way Out
· Foreign music—Spanish and French are my
favorites, but I’ll take anything I can’t understand. Any good Klingon rock
albums out there? Current go-to: The Best of the Gypsy Kings
·
Albums
I’ve heard a thousand times—If I’m hearing an album for the first time, I
can’t write anything—too distracted. Play that same album after I’ve heard it a
few times and it slowly fades into the background to become a sort of languid
wallpaper. Current indie darling: Washed Out—Within and Without
·
Catchy
songs I listen to again and again—Curse you Katy Perry, with your loose
morals and virulent T.G.I.F. If a song hooks me and doesn’t let go, I just hit
play, over and over and over again, until it submits to its place in the
background**. That and it’s just easier to keep playing the same song if it
puts me in a good, steady writing groove. Song that just topped 63 plays in a
row: Blondfire—Walking With Giants
Anyone else run into this with music? Is it just a writer
thing? I know an art director who can listen to a whole movie while he works.
And, of course, there are those seven dwarves with their incessant whistling …
*Not this blog. Heavens, no.
**Wow, that was sort of an aggressive sentence. I might need
to switch up my music playlist soon.
Labels:
albums,
beastie boys,
blondfire,
foreign,
gypsy kings,
instrumental,
katy perry,
music,
songs,
washed out,
writing
Thursday, January 12, 2012
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
The 99-cent-ers
Here's what happened: I was at a grocery store and the sum total of my purchase equaled $6.01. Let me be more specific: I was at Whole Foods. Why is that important? Because they have a policy* where the cashier asks you if you want to make a donation to some charity. It's not that I'm opposed to making donations or to charities, but I don't feel like the checkout line is the place to make--what I would hope would be--an informed decision about where to send my dollars. But there I was and the question was out there.
"Would you like to make a donation to XYZ charity?"
I decided to decline the opportunity. And maybe what happened next is Karma. Or maybe it was a jerk move by the cashier. But he, too, I felt, had an opportunity right then and there. He could have made a one-penny donation to me, his fellow man. But instead he decided--and I've never actually seen this happen before--to count out the full 99-cents!
Give a penny, take a penny?
Indeed, Karma. Indeed.
*Perhaps "initiative" is a better word? How about "well-meaning, but annoying interaction"?
"Would you like to make a donation to XYZ charity?"
I decided to decline the opportunity. And maybe what happened next is Karma. Or maybe it was a jerk move by the cashier. But he, too, I felt, had an opportunity right then and there. He could have made a one-penny donation to me, his fellow man. But instead he decided--and I've never actually seen this happen before--to count out the full 99-cents!
Give a penny, take a penny?
Indeed, Karma. Indeed.
*Perhaps "initiative" is a better word? How about "well-meaning, but annoying interaction"?
Labels:
99-cents,
Charity,
donations,
Karma,
Whole Foods
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Monday, January 9, 2012
Book Series Review: A Song of Ice and Fire
[Includes: Game of Thrones, A Storm of Swords, A Clash of
Kings, A Feast for Crows, and A Dance with Dragons.]
The Premise:
A fictional land called Westeros is threatened by a
mysterious enemy from without and its own ruling factions from within. This
sprawling fantasy epic follows members of various ruling families: The Starks
to the North, The Lannisters to the West, The Greyjoys of the Iron Islands, the
deposed Targaryens and their usurpers, the Baratheons. Many bonds are formed
and casualties had when everyone plays the Game of Thrones.
The Good:
Richly imagined by Mr. George R.R. Martin, this series does
not lack for detail. Even though there are close to twenty main characters and
hundreds of supplemental characters, each one seems to have their own
personality and background. And many of them are worth hanging out with for
hundreds of pages. The immersive world is also well thought out and the drama unfolds
slowly, so when something happens it feels truly consequential.
The Bad:
I’m going to be honest: I feel another LOST coming on. I don’t think that Mr. Martin really knows where
this story is going. Oh sure, he probably claims to have it all mapped out, but
I have my doubts. After five books, each about 1,000 pages, the story hasn’t even
begun to deliver on the premise set forth in the very first prologue. And, like
LOST, he is still introducing new
characters—a crutch used by authors and writers as a stalling tactic.
That all aside, one of my biggest problems with the story is
Westeros itself. As this world expands and sprawls across oceans, I become less
and less convinced that Westeros is a land worth fighting for. It seems to be
poor in wealth; lacks technological advantages and the Lords aren’t even as
powerful as their slave-owning counterparts. The characters fight for it
because the author wants them to, not because they should.
And the books are sadistic. There are some genuinely
horrifying elements that are described in all-too-grisly detail. An unnecessary
description of a rape comes to mind, as well as the mutilation of a main
character. Not things you’ll soon forget.
The Verdict:
Wait and see. Mr. Martin has said there will only be two
more books and he doesn’t look to be in the greatest of health. With a six-year
gap between the last two books, I would hold off on starting the series until
its completion, unless you want to roll the dice and hope it all works out.
Friday, January 6, 2012
A Tincture of Perspicacity
We here at That Tad Guy Industries™ have been solipsistic. And
fatuous. And perhaps a bit indolent. Our 2012 posts thus far have focused on
the physical because OUR resolutions have been ineluctably physical. But what,
pray tell, of the mental? Is there naught room for erudition? To elucidate
rather than adumbrate?
Our neglect has vitiated our intentions. We have become
somnambulistic with our posts at times, but we promise to renew our ardor to a point
just shy of unctuousness.
We appreciate your patience in our moment of grandiloquence.
Labels:
$5 words,
bombastic,
vocabulary
Thursday, January 5, 2012
Songs to which I workout*
1.
You’re The Best Around – Joe
Esposito
2.
Eye of the Tiger –Survivor
3.
Portable Radio – Hall & Oates
4.
Search & Destroy – The Stooges
5.
Blitzkrieg Bop – The Ramones
6.
Bombs Over Baghdad – Outkast
7.
Panther Dash – The GO! Team
8.
How You Like Me Now – The Heavy
9.
Bounce – MSTRKRFT feat. NORE
10. Tonight
– Moonbootica
11. Spaz
– N*E*R*D
12. Faded
– Soul Decision**
13. Toxic
– Britney Spears***
14. Daylight
– Matt & Kim
15. Stay
Fly – Three 6 Mafia
16. Hate
To Say I Told You So – The Hives
*Which may or may not explain my physique
**Yes, I freely admit that this song is terrible. Conversated? Rhymes with Faded.
***Toxic to masculinity? Perhaps.
Labels:
audio awesomeness,
workout songs
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
Let’s talk Sodium (aka, Sod-i-YUM)
![]() |
No one walks away from Salt for long. Just ask Pepper. |
Confusing, right?
So what to do? Try to limit the amount of sodium you consume
to less than 1500 milligrams per day*. Trust me, it’s harder than you think.
Every time you dine out at a typical restaurant you’re treating yourself to
sodium and lots of it. Processed foods in a can or that convenient on-the-go
treat in a wrapper? Sodium. So read the labels and do the math. Every little
bit adds up. Even in the so-called “reduced sodium” foods (reduced from a “ton”
to a “whole lotta”) oftentimes contain more than you want (but are better than the original).
Until an ideal ratio of sodium-to-calories is made standard,
food will contain too much sodium, so it’s your responsibility to monitor how
much is too much. And it's my responsibility to serve you unappetizingly bland food whenever you visit. Fair is fair.
*Ha! Good luck.
Labels:
how not to die,
salt,
sodium,
sodium-to-calorie ratio
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
Calories demystified.
For the uninitiated (you), calories are a mystery. I was
once like you. Confused. Confounded. Carefree. But one day, I was forced to
take a more active role in my health and started by reading nutritional labels.
And then I took a nap because, wow, are they boring.
Nutritional calories are made up of varying percentages
three things: Fat, Carbohydrates and Protein (there’s a fourth source, alcohol,
but it isn’t represented on nutritional labels and is delicious).
Fat calories have a value of 9 calories per gram.
Carbohydrates and Protein have a value of 4 calories per gram. Alcohol, if
you’re interested, has a value of 7 calories per gram (and is delicious).
To add to the confusion (or FUN!), there are different types
of Fat.
Trans Fat is the current trendy pick for being the worst of
the worst. It’s usually placed in italics for emphasis, like the hair standing
up on cat’s back—DO NOT TOUCH! At the moment, Trans Fat is seemingly being phased out, however, it’s most often
found in baked goods, like muffins and donuts. If you haven’t figured it out by
now, it’s best to avoid this type of fat altogether.
Saturated fat is the next worse type of fat, but you should
be able to consume up to two grams per day without significantly increasing
your risk of heart disease (or so they tell me; I am not a doctor).
Polyunsaturated and Monounsaturated fats are what are
considered “healthy” fats, so long as you consume them in reasonable quantities,
and are found in things like almonds. A handful of almonds per day is
completely reasonable. A can of almonds the size of your fist? Not as
reasonable.
Carbohydrates are also broken down on a label into smaller
parts, basically “good” and “evil”.
Fiber is nature’s laxative. It keeps the food you eat moving
along without any unplanned stops. I think the recommended daily amount is 35
grams of fiber. At that quantity it’s also recommended that you invest in some
good reading materials for the bathroom. Fiber comes in two forms: soluble and
insoluble. One helps you retain water better, but I forget which is which and,
honestly, most of the labels don’t even break it down to that level. So let’s
just say that all fiber is good fiber.
The Mr. Hyde side of Carbohydrates is sugars. Sweet, sweet
seductive sugars. Natural sugars found in fruit and vegetables are considered
healthier (although sugar is still sugar and should be limited). Refined sugars
are less desirable, but, like saturated fat, can be consumed in reasonable
quantities. Let’s say a good ratio of sugar to total carbs should be 1:2. That
sounds pretty reasonable, right?
Thankfully, mercifully, protein is just protein. But you
have to consider the source. Protein from animals brings with it cholesterol,
which should be consumed in moderate amounts, and the less red meat the better.
Protein from soy, beans or nuts doesn’t have cholesterol and is a major protein
source for vegetarians.
Put them all together and you should ideally get about 20%
of calories from fat, 40% from fiber-rich carbohydrates and 40% from lean
protein. Or a sandwich. Which you can wash down with some alcohol*.
*No, I'm not trying to get you drunk.
Monday, January 2, 2012
100 push-ups
That’s the goal. All at one time. By the end of the month.
If you were hoping that I’d resolve to be a better person or
pay my taxes* or blog on the weekends: no. I’m resolving to do the equivalent
of a Jersey Shore episode, without
the tanning, preening or STDs**.
Because this is the Internet, I could tell you that I already
have the physique of a Gold Medal Olympian*** and you would have to believe me.
It’s required by law in every country****, save Latvia. But I’ll be honest: I
have the physique of a Bronze Medalist.
And after eating a goodly sum of Holiday fare, this Bronze
Medalist was surprised to find out that he could do a Herculean ten (10) push-ups
in a row. TEN. One Zero. Whoops.
But what good is a goal without an incentive to stay focused
and motivated? Actually a lot of good, but what I propose is this: I’ll donate
a dollar to some charity***** for every push-up shy of 100 (100 – X = $Y) that
I am on January 31st. So if I do 75 push-ups, I’ll donate $25. If I forget to
do the push-ups entirely, then it’s the full $100 (yikes). If I do all 100,
then I get to enjoy the satisfaction that comes with not having to donate any
money.
If you want to join me, go head-to-head or just make fun of
me publicly, let me know.
If you want more info on how to do a push-up(s): http://hundredpushups.com
*Gotcha, IRS agents. Too easy.
**I have it on good authority that hiccups are not a
disease.
***Synchronized Floating
****The International Gullibility Act of 2012
*****A real one. Probably something to do with fitness. Feel
free to send suggestions.
Labels:
100 push-ups,
Charity,
New Year's Resolution 2012,
push ups
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