Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Things I’ve learned this week (so far)

Sometimes a week comes along where every moment is unexpected and every experience makes you question everything you’ve ever learned, seen or done beforehand. This is not one of those weeks. But it is a week where I discovered a few surprising facts.

FACT 1: There were a lot of amorous hippies looking to score some dates on Earth Day. My site visits were almost double my daily average thanks to the words “Earth Day pickup lines”. To all the Earth Day babies out there: welcome and always recycle.

FACT 2: People with “Proud Parent” bumper stickers probably have “embarrassed children”. That is to say that the parents are questionable drivers. I learned this by getting cut off twice during my daily commute by two separate drivers! No sticker for you.

FACT 3: My video gaming skills are a bit rusty. I found this out while playing Mass Effect 3 online with a buddy of mine. Let me put it this way: the mindless, stationary, automated drone eliminated more foes than my cogent, mobile, reactionary self did. Pathetic.

FACT 4: The proper ratio of toppings to salad is not 5:1. Turns out that a healthy amount of lettuce is what makes the whole thing work. Delicious. 

FACT 5: The automatic scheduler on Blogger has been flaking out on me. I'm not sure what happened yesterday, but my post should have been up at the regular 4:30 am time. My apologies if this ruined your day.