The St. Patrick’s Day Dash. The Zombie Run. The Color Run. It seems like you can’t lace up a pair of sneakers anymore without also draping yourself in a theme. So why fight it? Let’s embrace the race.
Top 5 runs I hope to see soon:
1. The Run Run—You just run. And at the end … you stop.
2. The Tax Dodge—IRS agents chase you. If you can cross the finish line without getting tackled to the ground, you don’t have to pay taxes that year.
3. The Presidential Race—Literally a foot race among the candidates. Or would you really rather have them run their mouths for a few more months?
4. The Paparazzi Run—10 celebrities; 100 photographers. The first celebrity across the finish line wins a year of un-photographed privacy.
5. The Backwards Run—Everyone runs a fun run backwards while music is also played backwards. Wait … Paul is dead?